How many times during the day do you feel this type of anger? How many times do you judge others?
Why are we so mad?
I don't know about you, but something seems to drive me. Between passion, belief, faith, there's also something else at work.....my wounds (cry me a river, Dave). Unless you never reflect, you may not relate to this, but if you think about things weekly or even daily on what drives you, start to bring up the time your older brother or sister beat you up; or your mom and dad weren't understanding of you; or the hurt or embarrassment a sibling caused on your family because of their actions; or the time you were unjustly punished, benched, graded, mocked, made fun of, misunderstood, or treated. Even more severely, maybe abuse was in your life; maybe mom and dad weren't around; or maybe they didn't care about you and your dreams. On the flip side, maybe you were pushed to hard; expectations were set to high, and you failed. Maybe you're still trying to live up to those expectations today. Any of this true in your life? How does it make you feel to read this, and 're-hash' crappy feelings?
In your life, has any of these 'violators' come back to you, and said their sorry? How did you respond? Was it something like this: You, "It's ok, I forgive you." How you really felt, "You're sorry? Are fucking kidding me?!?! You're sorry??? I can't stand you! You've ruined so much of my life, you've taken so much from me. Everyday I wake up, I'm frustrated and annoyed because of people like you. Don't be sorry. Those are just words." And then you move on, possibly even more upset than before. Anyone?
Well, that was me for a little while. I had a lot of reasons to be pissed....just like you. To be burned time and time again, and said sorry to, time and time again, when does it really become a reality?
I couldn't figure out why I was so mad, even-though I had been told sorry, or someone's new actions conveyed their deepest apologies towards me......I soon realized, after I let it consume me, or let it hold me back from my dreams, that it was no longer the 'violators' fault for letting my inner anger hold me back.....it was my fault.....I hadn't forgiven yet.
You see, the words 'I'm sorry' are powerful, however the words 'You're forgiven' are the most powerful. It releases you.....it releases them. It makes the act that was so hurtful, go away forever. It tips the energy scales from negative, to positive, opening these positive reserves back up for you. Now think, if you learned to forgive, and move on, just imagine how tipped the energy scale would be on the positive side. Do you follow me? This isn't about the violator....they already said sorry. This is about YOU. Our natural want is for the violator to feel the hurt that we felt because of them, and we hold the key to it because we never forgive them.....well, guess what....you're hurting yourself at the same time. Do you care that much that this other person hurts, eventhough they've already said sorry, that you'll do it to your own expense....to your own hurt? Why?
The world hurts us everyday, in one way or another..that's just reality. And sometimes the hurt sticks around longer than others....because we let it. You let it. I let it.
Stop imprisoning yourself with past hurts, and unforgiven 'sorries'. You have a big beautiful life to live. It's yours. Be free.
I forgive.
Do you?
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